The Women in the White Dress in the Cloaet
IDK if you've noticed, but there's been a lot of talk about ~weddings~ lately. From what counts as bridezilla behavior, to what's acceptable to expect of your bridesmaids.
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There's also been chatter about what's acceptable to wear to a wedding. Remember when everyone had OPINIONS about Kendall Jenner wearing this dress to Lauren Perez's wedding?
Well, we're back again with another look at wedding etiquette. This time, it has to do with both wedding guest fashion AND bride behavior. Recently, Reddit user u/runawaymaidofhonor posted in the Am I the Asshole subreddit asking if she was wrong for wearing white to her friend's wedding.
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In case you're unaware, r/AmItheAsshole is a place where people share juicy stories and people weigh in on if they're the ones in the wrong.
Here's the full story according to u/runawaymaidofhonor (or OP, for Original Poster):
OP met her friend Charlotte in college in August 2020, and they soon became close friends. Charlotte got engaged to her longtime boyfriend that same year, and has spent the last year and a half meticulously planning her wedding. "I won't say she's obsessive, but it's been INTENSE, and I've tried to help her as best I can with making appointments, managing stress, etc. I also gave her $250 to help pay for the wedding (her family can only afford part of it), which isn't included in the wedding gift I'm going to give her."
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"A month before the wedding, I was still trying to decide exactly what to wear. I wanted something nice, because Charlotte said she would have a photographer, videographer, and wedding painter. I knew Charlotte had a vision for her wedding, and I wanted her to be as in control as possible for all the details of her special day, so I asked her which dress out of the three I'd narrowed it down to that I should wear."
But instead of choosing between the three dresses OP picked, Charlotte asked her to pull out ALL of her dresses again, so she could rifle through and pick. "She ended up narrowing it down to one of my picks, along with a dress I had put firmly in the 'no' pile for being white. It was a wedding, after all."
"She told me both dresses were lovely, but that she preferred the white one. I asked if she was sure. She said yes, and even picked out a pair of pink and white heels from her closet to go with my dress. I figured that was that."
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One the day of the wedding, OP wore the white dress and shoes Charlotte picked out, and obviously gets a few weird looks. But, when Charlotte saw her, all hell broke loose. "She looks shocked to see me, and then she starts turning red. She pulls me aside and starts going off on me immediately about wearing the dress to her wedding. I'm stunned. I ask her what the problem is, because SHE picked the dress out, and she told me it was a 'friendship test,' and that if we were real friends, I wouldn't have worn a white dress or her shoes to her wedding."
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It didn't stop there. "I started laughing because I honestly thought it was a joke, and she screamed at me that I ruined her 'f***ing wedding' and to 'GTFO.' I flat out told her she was crazy, and left, not wanting to fight anymore and not knowing how to deal with what happened. I grabbed my wedding gift to them on the way out."
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Since then, OP's gotten countless texts, emails, and social media notifications from Charlotte, her friends, and her family about how horrible she was for wearing the dress to her wedding.
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And here's the real kicker: OP revealed in an update on the thread that Charlotte didn't even wear white on her wedding day. She wore BLUE.
Lifetime
Needless to say, the comments section exploded. Lots of people called out the bride for being so manipulative:
"When someone is mad at you because they lied to you and you believed them, that person is [the asshole], regardless of what conventions exist in the broader culture about colors of dresses. Your friend lied to your face and embarrassed you in public just to see if she could."
—u/tay-Mellow
"PLUS, the bride actually had OP go out of her way to pull all of her dresses out of her closet, just so she could find the inappropriate one. It's not like she saw a white dress and thought 'OP actually pulled out a white dress?!? I think I'm gonna test her.' No, she deliberately went looking for it!"
—u/aitaLurker23
Others took issue with the fact that she was freaking out over a white dress when she herself didn't even wear white — SHE WORE BLUE:
"The thing that baffles me most is that even after being told to wear the dress, I think most women would be like, 'nah, the bride is in white, I'm just not gonna touch this with a 10-foot pole.' But Charlotte was wearing blue, and the OP knew this, so she didn't even have the 'don't wear the same color as the bride' etiquette to fall back on to make her feel okay about not following her 'friend's wishes.'"
—u/katelledee
And finally, some told OP to immediately drop Charlotte as a friend:
"Tell her you don't want to be friends with someone who tricked you, embarrassed you, and 'ruined her own wedding' by her actions. That was so messed up of her. Who does that? If I were you, I would never be friends with her again.
—u/TheRedSkittle4
Where do you stand on this??? Was this absolute bridezilla behavior, or should OP have known not to wear white to a wedding under ANY circumstances? Tell us in the comments. And for more drama-filled wedding stories — like the couple who didn't feed their guests so Minnie and Mickey could make an appearance, or the bridesmaid who left a wedding early — click here.
Source: https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/woman-got-tricked-bride-wearing-034603989.html
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